Life lived abunduntly through nature, health and God
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‘Alot of people put in gardens thinking, ‘oh look I’m doing this great thing for my body and I’m being all eco-friendly, but they never put anything useful back into the soil, so they expect the earth to just give them all the minerals and life giving things from the plants they grow and then they dont give anything back’. ~ summerized quote from Kirk, owner of Cascade Meadow Farms

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My neighbor and I went to see Kirk and his lovely little farm last weekend.  We were met by a thin, heavily bearded jolly guy that immediately introduced us to his guinea hogs that have free reign of the place.  Tereza (as we shall call my neighbor here on)  and I were smitten with them immediately as we scratched their tight broad bellies and fuzzy little ears.  We were completely sold on them after holding a few of the 2 day old piglets.  This next weekend we are hoping to go purchase a breeding pair from him.

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From there we wandered into the Icelandic sheep and Dexter cow herds for their daily feeding of winter hay, and Kirk continued his passionate monologue regarding soil health, nitrogen, the relationship of grass and red clover and how vital it is to the protein feeding of your livestock and essential  to the consumer of the beef products.  It was fascinating.  He doesn’t truck in fertilizers and weed killers, antibiotics or heavy machinery.  He doesn’t send the manure off the land or heap into piles covered in tarps.  He uses the natural spring to water, good pasture rotation, the natural fertilizer that is manure and the common sense of letting nature be your teacher to create a successful, yet humble little farm empire.  His animals were happy, healthy and docile.  They trusted Kirk, you could see it in their eyes as they blinked contentedly as he scratched them behind the ears or withers.

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In the same thread, Tereza and I have been researching permaculture and what it means to grow and sustain while giving back to the earth and not eroding the land we use.  Instead of rotatilling, we are simply sheet mulching right on top of existing grass.  We started discussing the hugelkultur method of building up your soil, which suggests using logs and forest debris in a pile and then heaping on manure, or finished compost, straw or other leafy debris right over the top and let nature take it’s course.  The logs act as a sponge as they decompose aiding in proper drainage as well as being a water source during warmer months.  Planting right on top of this requires little effort, because nature knows best.

I love this.  I love this so much.  It feels so right to garden with the natural cycles and courses of the earth, climate and seasons.  We aren’t disrupting nature, we are adding to it, becoming part of it, including it in our daily lives.  As opposed to simply cutting out our plot of garden space, ripping out the weeds to keep our garden area ‘clean’, poison the bugs and animals that come near it and scare away the birds.  Because nature doesn’t belong in the garden! I have been of the later school of thinking my whole life really.  I knew that manure was good for the soil, but it’s only been recently that I’ve realized that before miracle grow, pesticides, black gold topsoil that you buy at the grocery store, and seedlings from the nursery, that nature knew how to do this well and even more easily!  The weeds I used to yank out, some of them are nutritious herbs, or helpful in deterring harmful bugs, or they provide shade to the seedlings.

I love this video!  It puts it to words and images so well.

The reason I really like this is because of how this is all an incredible metaphor to community and spirituality.  I love thinking of my spiritual community as a permaculture garden.  We don’t cut out our plot of space, declaring it a church for a certain type of individual.  There is room for any life.  The focus is to give back, to sustain to find harmony amongst the community, the city and individuals.  We aren’t afraid of chaos.  Because we grow when we are challenged with hardships.  We are there to provide shade for the weary and to be willing to turn around and ask for a hand as well. We thrive in our messy garden.  Because life is messy.  My spiritual life isn’t pristine, my relationship with my savior, Jesus, still has much room for growth.  My community is not well polished.  But we can still be fruitful.  The goal is to be fruitful in real every day life.  Much like the tomatoes that will grow from a raised hugelkultur bed.  It would be hard to tell that it is a garden, except that there is productive life happening in there.   Spirituality shouldn’t be a separate box in your life, it should be intertwined with every faucet of your being.  Spirituality = Nature.  If you try to force growth in your garden (your soul) with chemicals and keep it separate from everything else, it will only be fruitful (but not substantial) for a short time.  The minerals will wear out.  The facade will vanish and you will be left with an eroded soul.  (Am I getting too metaphoric here?)

It’s beautiful, isn’t it?  Doesn’t that seem so natural?  Both the gardening and the spiritual application?  Nature has so much to teach us when we stop trying to fight against it and instead pay attention.  I believe that is part of God’s plan.  He has given us the tools we need.  For abundant life, for health, and for community.

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A few reading resources regarding sheet mulching, hugelkultur and permaculture

Hugelkultur

Permaculture

Sheet Mulching

I still have 2 projects to finish.  I over cooked my eggnog and should make another.  I need to clean my house and get to bed…. but I cant.

I cant stop crying.

I’ve been reading this blog the past few days.  And I have bawled my eyes out numerous times.  I know, now you’re not gonna want to check it out.  No one wants to read something sad if they’re in a cheerful mood.

http://lothblogs.wordpress.com/

But I felt compelled.  And I’m glad I did.  I am so inspired by these parents.  Their faith in this situation is astounding.  I don’t know that I would be quite as graceful about it all if I were in their position.  I don’t even KNOW these people, but I have been so impacted by them.

I am most thankful for them because of this reminder.

That I know, believe and trust in a God… actually just GOD, that there is redemption for our pain.  That their is hope beyond just this life.  That it will all make sense!!  Why is this little child suffering?!!   I don’t know, but God isn’t blind to it and their will be an answer beyond this Life, but for now it has brought hundreds of peoples attention to the salvation that God offers us in our pain.  and we ALL have it.  Don’t pretend you dont.

We don’t have to live scared and hurting and wondering what we’re doing here.

We can have Peace.

And through my tears I find that I have a burning in my heart that is peace.  True peace.  And that is something you cant wrap and put under a tree.  But you can have it simply by admitting it’s there to have and asking for it.

So for CHRISTmas this year I have the only present I’ve ever wanted.  I am accepted.  I am loved for who I am.  And I am constantly pursuing what will give me purpose, and that is simply to be a woman, a girl, a child that was made and created simply to be loved by my Creator, and in turn to LOVE others.

If you read that blog I attached, pray that the family has peace in whatever outcome may be.  And then go kiss your own children, hug your spouse and family.  Mend your relationships, or even go CREATE some relationships.  And remember that beyond politics, employment, the culmination of STUFF, the pursuit of living as long as you can…. that at the soul of all of us is a longing for peace and love.

Go be Peace and Love through Christ.

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This last weekend I spent on the Oregon Coast with some of the ladies from my church community in hopes that I would find deeper connections, refreshment and escape in order to clear my mind.

It was fitting that we stayed on the beach where Seth and I first started dating 8 years ago.  We had grabbed each others hands, looked at one another and exchanged a few words along the lines of,

‘I know.  Do you know?’

‘Yes.  I know this is it.’

Then we stood at the waters edge in the dusk of a September evening and looked out across the endless sea, as though we were looking out over the future of our relationship.

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I traveled south Saturday afternoon to the place that a particularly stormy season in my life had left me washed up on shore in a tiny town, looking for answers just 1 year before Seth and I began dating.

In an effort to completely be alone  I made my way to a small cove and a secluded beach.  The wind was picking up and the bleached sand was scittering across the dunes like wispy clouds.

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One side is protected by a cliff, a cliff I once climbed and stood at the edge of willing the sea to take me into its depths.  I had longed to be washed over and to find silence.

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It was here that I first encountered God in the raw.

Not the God that was bound by the pulpit, nor enclosed by walls and stained glass.  This was not the God that you find in quiet little church songs and hushed ‘hallelujahs’.

This was a God that could churn the sea and command the clouds.  A Creator who drove down the rain and painted with the scattered sand.

During that season, I would walk out alone on stormy nights and kneel in the waves.  Hoping to be taken by them and instead I was washed over by peace.  God used the raw power of the frigid water, the stinging sand and the terrible gusts to reveal Himself to me.

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I would often find myself sobbing, the chorus of waves singing to their Master, the howling wind and rain would swirl around me in a hymn of redemption and I felt as though my soul were being stripped.  And it hurt.  All I had was baggage and sorrow and the God of All used it to paint a new identity for me.  I found comfort in feeling so small and yet so important to this Deity of the Deep.

This weekend I stood in that very same spot at the waters edge and once again felt the stinging sand, and the spray of the sea while the wind whispered loudly into my soul.

And then I heard silence.  I felt that same peace that washed over me as though I had dived into the surf.  I was in the storm, but I was not afraid.

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The storm battered trees stood at the cliffs edge, their roots driven deep into the rocks, their hold secure.

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I was reminded of Gods ability to create a nature that is so intense and awesome and yet he saw me standing alone on a beach 9 years ago and he cared for my broken heart.  He answered when I yelled at the waves and screamed at the stars.  He rebuilt me and changed me.  He has taught me to drive my roots deep into the rocks and now when the storms come I am at peace.

The Creator of the sea has redeemed me.

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Once upon a time Seth and I started a notebook of things we’d like to accomplish before we met our Maker.  I believe my list includes such things as

* Get dreads

* Live in a Yurt

* Backback through Europe

* Take cooking classes

* Become a Yoga instructor

* Own a Cow….

Okay, I have some strange dreams.

Seth’s looked something like

* Tour with a Band

* Learn to play slide quitar

* Have my own man room where I can smoke and play poker with the guys

*Road trip in a VW bus

Hmmmm… I think he was weaned from Bachelorhood too early :)

Aside from those more ‘lofty’ dreams, we all have our everyday dreams too, right?  Like getting into olympic body shape, or making 6 digits, or even owning a car that doesn’t leak oil, maybe even ‘charitable’ goals, like serve the poor in Africa.  We all feel like we’re entitled to live and realize our dreams, like we will have been cheated if we look back over our life and never had the opportunity to experience the ‘joy’ that comes with certain activities or freedoms.  But isn’t that what we’re all really looking for?  freedom?  The ability to do what we want and be what we want.  I wonder how many of the rich and famous feel truly free.  With all that money that owns them, and the responsibility that comes with it.  How about my dream to own a cow?  That would give me the freedom to have Raw milk at my fingertips.  That’s freedom, right?  I don’t have to pay $11 a gallon for milk anymore.   But I have to milk the cow.  So if we all judge our life by obtaining certain experiences, then I think that knowing that at the heart of that desire is the longing for freedom.

We were talking at our church gathering about a passage in John, and the topic of freedom came up.  How we are free in Christ.  I think what I took away from that is knowing that I am free to NOT have to have the ‘ideal’ life.  The example Jesus left for us is that we should make ourselves about our relationships, not accomplishments.  Jesus is known for how He interacted with people, not for being a carpenter.  Or for His travels.  His life doesn’t strike me as glamorous, but how many people living the ‘glamorous’ life, are truly and deeply satisfied with it?  Perhaps there is freedom in NOT having.  In being simple and content.  In spending hours talking with your neighbor even though your intent was to beautify your yard.  How many times have I avoided confrontation with a stranger so that I could accomplish the task at hand.  And even when I meet a goal, or had my ‘dream’ job, or went on vacation, or even when my body was in the best shape it had ever been, I still had emptiness and dissatisfaction.  Perhaps it is okay to dream, but to know there is freedom if you never reach it.  Or even if you do, that it isn’t going to fill that void that we all have.  A void that wants to know our purpose.  I think of the ‘free-est’ people I know, and they are individuals that either have little, or could care less if it was gone tomorrow.  I find a huge burden lifted knowing that if my gravestone didn’t have a list of accomplishments, that I would die happy.  If people at my eulogy spoke of the joy they had in conversation with me and not about my travels and abilities, that would be of much more meaning to me, and hopefully to them.

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