Life lived abunduntly through nature, health and God
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Oh bountiful, nutritive, lovely Comfrey!

The sweetness of spring is evident in the Willamette Valley.  Plum and Cherry trees sprinkle their pink confetti joyfully across new green turf, buds pop out of seemingly dead branches.  Birds sing a chorus of joy in response to winters end.  The first day of spring was marked by the random pattern of wind, sun, hail, dark foreboding clouds illuminated by the opposing sun.  The world around seemingly in a battle of old and new, dark and light, winter and spring.  Spring won by days end and we were all blessed by several days of warmth and beautiful clear skies.

My heart feels like spring.  The sight of daphne, daffodils, hyacinth and other tiny shoots emerging from the soil feels so much like a metaphor for my inner world.  I have been longing for the end of this winter.  The end of a dark season in my heart.  It has been so heavy.  Death, decay, sadness and grief covered me in veil of fog and cold.  In the way that I would catch a chill that couldn’t be driven away by any amount of fire, heat or extra layers, so my soul felt chilled.  While the Pacific NorthWest weathered a mild winter, it felt like Siberia in my innermost being.

But now.  NOW!  Glorious sun and new growth!  I have never loved spring more, I think.  And while the hard moments continue to roll over us on the personal front, I feel that a new chapter is beginning and my inner fire and peace have returned.

Even though today is rainy, it still smells overwhelmingly like the perfume of a new season.  The smell of spring rain is so sweet, tinged with blossoms, earth and sun.

 

Ducks in the Oregano. Such good little slug gobblers!

 

The old chicken yard is being prepped to become the duck sanctuary

The new chicken roost which is situated OUTSIDE of the yard. No more chicken scratching and pooping in the yard!

I was able to take down the rag-tag fencing surrounding my garden area now that the chickens have been relocated outside of the main yard area.

 

No more reaching over awkward fencing to pick lettuce and herbs!

We traded out our male rabbit for two more female Angoras.  This is Forest, our new cream female.

 

Forest will be going with us today for a 'looking zoo' exhibit at our local market

The girls have a new bunny condo, two stories with a spacious floorplan.

Juniper, our original female with Fawn, one of our other new bunnies.

 

Prepping a new bed for more Raspberries!

My parent’s took their trailer up North, as they have a big project on their hands of renovating a new home with a few acres.  The end of a season of having them out several times a month has made new space for a fire pit and chicken yard.  And I’m already scheming about putting some cattle on their new land…..

We have big plans to use our new fire pit often!

I can't resist a picture of Majestic Heidi-Katt

 

The hens exploring their new modgepodge nesting area

Freyja knows no enemies. She tries so hard to get the bunnies to play with her!

 

May you feel Spring in your soul as it is outside!!

 

Aww! Duckling love.

“I didn’t always know what I wanted to do, but I knew the kind of woman I wanted to be.”

Diane von Furstenberg

We have new Cayuga ducklings.  They’re more adorable than I can wrap my mind around.  Who doesn’t love baby animals?!  Ugh.  They will be our slug and pest patrol, layers of Black-Gray eggs and new pets.

Left to Right, Shaniqua and Shenae-nae

 

Seth and I completely dismantled the old large chicken coop that proved to be sturdier than needed, and architecturally non-conductive to its purpose. I’ve replanted the chicken yard with lettuces, peas, spinach, buckwheat,comfrey and wild flowers after using a pitch fork to loosen the manure packed ground.  By the time  Shenae-Nae and Shaniqua are ready to be outside, the new duck yard should be prolific with greenery, have a little pond (read:kids pool) and the Clematis climbing the maple sapling will have bloomed.

This past week Seth was away on business in Germany (lucky duck!) and so I had a lot of time to be in my own head.  A wild sea of thoughts raged as I spent the hours doing what I do.  Cleaning, cooking, knitting, digging, building, soothing tears and mending brotherly feuds.

I was reflecting on this past year and how hilly it has been.  Like every year, really.  Just a different roller coaster.  The struggle of finances, the difference between my dreams and Seth’s.  Impatiently waiting for a dream to fall out of the sky, the vision of 40 acres being whisked away and replaced with no change in location at all.  The joys of motherhood (truly, I’m not being sarcastic), the constant ebb and flow of community, hardship and blessings.

Today I was struck by the quote above.  About not being sure of what you want to do, but knowing WHO you want to be.  It is really so easy to be tangled up in what you want to do.  We idolize celebrities for how their hair looks, the parts they play in a movie.  We idolize people who excel at their craft, write compelling music, accomplish feats of strength.  It is rare to be inspired by WHO someone is.  Not what they do.  Not how they look.  But by the character that courses through their blood.  Mother Theresa, Ghandi, Jesus, Martin Luther King.  We all like to say we admire those people, but we rarely put forth effort to create character of our own.  Perhaps if we dress like our favorite musician, or quote our favorite Nobel Peace prize winner, than by association, we will have real character.  Maybe if we send money to the afflicted or take dinner to a neighbor, then we’ll be a ‘good’ person.

True Character doesn’t come from emulating someone.  If doesn’t come from singular acts of goodwill.  It comes from the refinement of our daily choices.  It comes from change at the heart level.

I tend to focus so much on what I do being WHO I am.  I am a gardener.  A cook.  A knitter.  A rock climber.  I am a seeker of natural remedies and traditional healing.  But if I didn’t DO those things, I would still need to BE someone.

I want to be Grace.  I want to be love.  I want to be compassion.  I want to exude JOY and peace.  It is my desire to give freely of my time and my resources.  To be heartfelt in my words, and quiet when I have nothing to say that I haven’t thought through.  I want to be a field of wild flowers and an orchard of fruit.  To offer shade, nourishment, simple joy and wild beauty.

That isn’t something I can get from modeling after someone’s actions.  But to practice and to request refinement of my character.  To weather storms instead of wishing them away.  I will accomplish these things by BEING when I am not DOING anything.

And so the woman I want to be is me.  But I want to be a more refined version of myself.

“There is a season for wildness and a season for settledness, and this is neither. This season is about becoming.”

Shauna Niequist

 

I was reminded over the weekend not to overlook the beauty that surrounds me in the present because I am so obsessed at peeking over the fence at what I hope the future holds…

So right now the beauty that surrounds me is the coming of Spring in the Willamette Valley.  The lush green grass is beginning to push through muddy ground, the chickens are laying again (thank da lawd, cause I was about to go on a mass butchering spree!) and the weather is turning from still and cold to blustery with hints of spring tinged warmth.  I feel the exhilaration in the air.  Birds are chirping with the song of expectation, the neighbor’s guinea hog had a litter of piglets and my first little sprouts have emerged from their warm soil in the cold frame.

 

Mizuna, Spinach, Lacinato Kale and lettuce mix, making their spring debut!

 

Heidi the sneaky-Katt, enjoying the coveted late winter sun
5 eggs a day! Hallelujah!

The Levenwick Cardigan

The last picture is of the cardigan I finished for a friend.  The profit will go directly to my Future Farm Fund!  Yay!  Every dime, dollar and penny brings us closer :)

*****I recieved my first donation towards the Wild Hair Farm Campaign!!  I was sooo excited!  It made this feel even more real.  ‘We’re doing this!’, I thought to myself.  ‘Soon, I’ll be standing on my own land.’  I’ll tell you this much.  The day we purchase that property, I will surely sob with joy!  Thank you to my generous friends!******

 

I’m reading the book, ‘The Language of Flowers’.  Aside from the storyline, there’s an underlying theme about what each flower represents.  Lavender represents mistrust.  Which I think is unfair, because I love lavender.. Yellow roses mean infidelity.  Yikes.  Noted.  Lily of the Valley means sweetness, humility and the return to happiness.  I’m even more glad that I had chosen that as my bouquet at my wedding.  I decided to look up the meaning of my favorite flower.  Calendula.  The aroma is intoxicating.  Pungent, sweet and musky.  I’ve often been found in my garden with one just  about shoved up my nose.  It is pure delight.  The meaning: Passion and Creativity.  Sympathy.  Winning Grace.

I now love Calendula even more.  I want FIELDS of it.  So many that I could open my window and the breeze would carry in their scent.  I decided that will be the very first thing I do when we buy land.  I will walk the perimeter and sprinkle Calendula seeds.  Blessing my land with Passion, Creativity, Sympathy for others and Grace.

Much love to you all.   Whats your favorite flower?

*****Curious about my farm inspirations?  Check out my Pinterest and Tumblr worlds! ******

 

Last night I stayed awake thinking of farm names.  Thinking about what I would do first on the future farm of dreams.

I think I’ll put in an herb garden.  Yes.  Before anything else, I’ll transplant my herbs.

I drifted off to sleep last night envisioning how I would assign spots to each plant.

Lavender next to….Rosemary?  Hmm… No.  Rosemary next to lemonbalm, which will be next to catnip and agrimony and hmm.. where to put Comfrey that it wont over propagate….

The first thought on my mind this morning was thoughts of slipping on a barn coat in the wee hours of the winters to milk a goat with enough time to make breakfast and coffee before Seth heads out the door for work.

The barnyard will be still, the only sounds will be of animals stretching and finding one another in the early twilight glow…warm muzzles and soft noses breathing out billowy clouds like tame dragons.  The barn cats blinking away darkness while stretching long claws into straw.

It was a thought that warmed me.  Some of you might feel similarly about mornings in that you like to wake slowly.  Perhaps you prefer minimal talking until the haze of sleep drains from your eyes and your muscles have shaken off the feeling of rest and begun to warm up to the idea of movement.  I find that waking at the last minute to the sound of shrill voices inquiring about breakfast can sometimes be jarring, how little hands tugging on my robe as I stare into the cupboards trying to remember what I was looking for in my early morning stupor is abrupt and seems to put me on edge .  I could wake an hour earlier if I had a good reason,  a reason that I couldn’t push the snooze button for without consequence.  I wouldn’t leave a full utter-ed goat for a few extra moments of sleep, and once the morning air had reddened my cheeks and the smell of dirt and dew had awoken my senses, I am certain I would have a more cheerful outlook on the days schedule.

Perhaps you still cant tell that I am an excitable person. I am.  I am either an inferno of flames or a cold bed of ashes.  I rarely simmer slowly like seasoned coals.  It’s a trait I am working to balance out.  But, I don’t feel ashamed of my zeal.  I am a passionate person by nature, and I think in the right context it is a wonderful characteristic!  And this farm dream of mine has likely been my record for keeping a fire burning strong.

Perhaps you passionate people out there will understand what I mean by saying that when met by opposition I am easily extinguished.  If the road seems too long, too treacherous and perhaps full of potholes that look like negative feedback, I turn away in search of another brighter, cheerful road.  In an effort to mature those weaknesses of mine, it would be best that I learn perseverance.  And this is a dream I feel is worthy to perservere through valleys and hardship.

Around the home, chatter turns to land, home buying and things of that nature several times a day.  Keeping the conversation audible between Seth and I helps me to keep my expectations in check.

‘So… what kind of ducks do you like?  I like those Indian Runner ducks, have you seen them?  They’re so quirky and comical!’

Indian Runner ducks. I love how they stand so upright!

Seth replies, ‘MMmm.. I don’t really them.  I want something more traditional and really brightly colored.’

‘Harlequin?  Cayuga?’  I quickly pull up images and descriptions of each

Seth: ‘Yeah, one of those.  I like those.  Can we get some of them?’

The graceful and iridescently green Cayuga duck

And so we continue to iron out the details, checking in with one another.  Always keeping in mind the other person’s hesitations and requests.

And I continue to knit and create items for the farmers market coming up at the end of May.  By summers end we should have an idea of what kind of property we can afford and when to make the plunge!!!  It will be here before we know it!

And with further consideration I’ve decided on adding a ‘Donate’ button on my sidebar.  The $ will go to a special savings account we’ve set aside for the sole purpose of raising money for “THE FARM”.  The money will not be touched for anything but the farm.  It will not, and this is my promise to you my friends, be used for anything BUT the Farm.  You will all be the first to know when the withdrawal is made!  As a thank you, I will do some series on animal care, natural home first aid, essential oil use and other hair-brained ideas that I come up with! Maybe… just maybe I’ll even do a video series.  Or maybe the interwebs are better off not having my awkward face rambling off track about herbs and twigs and cauldrons launched into the infinite abyss!

I’ll keep the Farm Campaign button up till summer’s end and we’ll see what we’ve got!  Does anyone know how to post a meter on the sidebar that can track our giving progress?  Donate a dime, a dollar, 10, nothing or whatever your heart desires!  I am hopeful that this year WILL be the year of goats, gardens and grace.  And of course, ya’ll are welcome to come visit, milk a goat, eat some fresh strawberries and enjoy an evening of farm, food and some whimsical fun once we’ve made our farm purchase!  And I want to preemptively thank you for your encouragement, support, cheers and advice along the way.  I’ll need you to help me keep this fire stoked!

In the mean time I am going to be readying a little spot out by Seth’s shop for some Cayuga ducks…..

 

 

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